We are working on the “heart of a man” posts, but unfortunately they are taking forever to compile. So instead of waiting, I thought I’d post about something else.
I’ve been talking with a few women lately and praying about their marriages. One thing that keeps sticking out to me is this: the truth is not validated or invalidated by our opinions of the truth.
There are so many lies about porn. So many people will tell you it’s no big deal. Every man looks. Just look too. Celebrity crushes are healthy. Porn is a good way to spice up your marriage. That’s great that people have these coping mechanisms, but their relationships are suffering.
Why?
Because their intimacy is torn by these lies they choose to believe. Marital intimacy is meant for husband and wife. Not husband and wife and some other woman, some other man, and Joe Shmoe from down the street. It’s meant for two people. When we include others, true intimacy suffers.
And back to my original point. The truth is this, whether we choose to believe it or not:
Porn is a billion dollar business.
Porn hurts marriages, women, men, children, little girls, little boys, porn stars, producers, directors, etc., every day. Every single day.
Porn is self-centered.
Viewing porn is an adulterous act.
You know, movies like Lord of the Rings resonate with us for so many reasons. One of those reasons is that the good characters are noble, beautiful, and loving people. We have a simple, simple hobbit changing the course of the world with his faithfulness. We have his best friend who demonstrates such beautiful faithfulness. We have people giving up their lives to save others. Think about that.
In our own lives, we are so far from these qualities when we allow porn to seep into our hearts. We are self-centered. We can’t truly love others and love porn, not when we know what it does to those involved with it. Not when we know how much pain it causes so, so many people. Note: You can love others and love porn. But you can’t truly and self-sacrificially love others and love porn. You just can’t.
I don’t know about you, but I want to be noble. I want to be a hero, not a villian, in this life and in the lives of others. Don’t you?
Don’t listen to the lies. Because whether your opinion is that porn is good or not, the truth remains. Look at the evidence. Look at the broken marriages. Look at the broken hearts. Look at the reason you participate in porn. Is your reason noble? Is your reason as beautiful as the reason Frodo took the ring to Mordor?
I have a feeling it isn’t. Porn stars create porn because they are seeking their identity and value in being an object and wanted. Porn producers make porn for money. And people watch porn for their own self-centered appetites for pleasure that isn’t anywhere close to the beauty of selflessly pleasing others.
Porn is not beautiful, and anyone participating in porn is not doing something beautiful. Porn is harmful. It kills lives and relationships.
My hope is for more people to see this truth and live in it with more nobility and faithfulness than the fictional characters portrayed in Lord of the Rings. We need more Frodo’s and Aragorn’s and Sam’s and Gandolf’s. We need more people willing to lay down their lives, fight for goodness and love, and step up to the evil that is around them, instead of giving in to its power.
Who’s army are you fighting in?
